Retirement, or as I have renamed it–MEtirement–is a daily journey. Not a straight line from here to there but an evolution. With unending spare time on your hands, you can either sit around and watch TV or you can get moving. Mentally and physically. Creatively and energetically. It’s all what you make it. However you make it, retirement as a growth opportunity is a great approach to this next chapter in your life.
Four Things that will Make You Jealous
With almost a year of reflection behind me, there are some things about MEtirement which I expected, and others which came as a complete surprise. While I discuss these observations in the context of retiring after decades of working for others, they are equally applicable to anyone who has left their current job or who is thinking of doing so, no matter what their age. The list below is not exhaustive and it is continually expanding. But here are the top four things that have been the most life-altering. All good.
Meeting new people
First, I am surprised by how many people I have met, now that I have time to actually go out in the world to places I want to be. I set a routine early on and I have stuck to it. Having a routine gives me some structure in an otherwise-unstructured existence. What I mean by this (and the reason I needed it) is that after working for nearly 40 years in mostly the same type of office environment (law office and in-house legal department), now I was waking up in the morning and had nowhere I had to be. No more commute to the office and no more colleagues. But nowhere can turn into lost or adrift pretty quickly.
So I chose to go to the gym every morning. And each day I saw the same group of people who shared my interest in staying healthy and being committed to an exercise routine. The daily contact with new and interesting people also assured that I would not become isolated from the rest of the world. During these daily encounters, I benefitted from many new perspectives and absorbed recommendations for interesting books to read and places to visit. Not being around lawyers all day also expanded my knowledge of many other subjects and lifestyles. Turns out there are lots of fascinating people out there if you just find opportunities to engage with them.
If you are not yet of true “retirement age”, find ways to meet other people. Go to the park and meet other Moms. Volunteer at a school. Take a class. It is surprising how easy it is to make friends when you break out of your usual and comfortable go-to list of acquaintances and colleagues.
Time flies by when you’re having fun
Second, I am flabbergasted most days at how fast the time goes. I hope this is not just a function of getting older. I refuse to tell anyone that “time is just flying by” because I sound like my grandparents. And yet, it really is. The days pass by so incredibly quickly that by the time I look at my watch for the first time all day, it is usually 4 pm. Between the gym, blogging and Instagram, taking lots of social media- focused online classes and listening to podcasts, I find the day to be compressed into what feels like an hour or two. And how many times at work do you look at the clock? It’s a whole different world.
A new perspective on life and patience
Third, I feel content ALL THE TIME. I don’t rush anywhere but I am always on time if I need to be. I plan my days. But only with things I want to do. I spend a lot of time around two little grandchildren. It has given me a younger perspective and patience. I realize now, in hindsight, that unfortunately, it is hard to feel really content with a job and children and so many responsibilities. Being pulled into the vortex of activities and pressures all of the time makes a person cranky, frustrated and worse. To say the least. But then, in MEtirement, one major time zapper–work–is eliminated. And all of that fresh air that MEtirement brings into your life lifts you to a different and more relaxed place.
Time now to feel grateful and to observe all those details out in the world and, although it is a total cliché, smell the flowers. There is even time to actually THINK. So if young parents could only find a way to create that space, free of obligations and worries (even for a short time), they would see in the moment how wonderful life can be. I didn’t do enough of that in my younger days and I am trying to capture those moments now and freeze them, savor them, and appreciate them. You don’t have to be older to do that; you just have to be more mindful and focused on the “now”.
Insatiable quest for knowledge
Fourth, the gift of free time has revived my insatiable quest for knowledge. Instead of drafting letters and memoranda in my sleep, I think about recipes and photography. And writing on the blog and possibly publishing a cookbook. I cannot get enough of all things creative. What have I learned? I have learned how to have a blog. It is not easy. Not only because it requires a time commitment but also because it is technically demanding. I get pop-up error messages that give me heart palpitations. Yet, I persist and the blog has become a great source of entertainment and satisfaction for me.
What else have I learned? Food styling and photography. A year ago, I didn’t know how to use a camera. I had no idea that you can’t take good photographs if you are shooting with indoor overhead lights. Silly me. Apparently, that is Photography 101. Also, you can’t shoot in bright sunshine. Again, no idea. MEtirement put me on a path of taking creative risk. What does a lawyer know about being creative? Lawyers are wedded to rules and regulations. While you have to be smart in order to interpret and apply them, it is not what I would consider to be really “creative”.
Learning to grow creatively
Here is an example of how far I have come. Exhibit A. Early photograph before I started down the path of educating myself in photography methods and techniques:
This photo is yellow. It’s out of focus. It looks like dog food even though it is a delicious chicken and artichoke stew. And there were more photos which were even worse.
Creativity, having long lay dormant (or more likely was non-existent), had to be learned. So total immersion (thanks to a wide-open schedule) in food styling and photography was the only way I could think of to fast-track what I hoped would be proficiency. I took what I did know (writing, organization, and experience in how to digest huge amounts of information) and combined it with a desire to become really good at just a few things. You have to accept the fact that you will never be good at everything no matter how hard you try.
Diving into design and what I want to focus on
So the first thing to go was anything to do with computer software or coding. I had to leave the blog set up and maintenance to someone else. Thanks Lauren @ https://www.oncecoupled.com. What I wanted to control was the content, especially the recipe development and writing. So I could check that off of my list as something that was manageable. Finally, food photography was something I had to learn to do. It would be very challenging for someone without a camera or food styling skills but I didn’t know how challenging. I have never painted nor do I know how to draw. Design, interior, graphic or otherwise was not something I was familiar with.
I watched video after video, especially those on Food Blogger Pro and I followed many social influencers like Jenny Melrose and Helene Sula. I sought out food bloggers who generously shared their wisdom, especially Lindsay Ostrom at Pinch of Yum and Brooke Lark at Cheeky Kitchen. It amazes me how truly enthusiastic bloggers are and how willing they are to encourage others. So that’s another MEtirement observation. When you break free of your confined and confining office environment, you find that there are so many kind, interesting, talented, funny, creative, mult–faceted and generous people out in the world.
So now…..please let me show you, in the most concrete terms, how I have grown in the last year. Here is another one of my first food photos:
Again, yellow and out of focus. What was I thinking?
And finally, here is my favorite photo from this week after intensive training at the Pinch of Yum Workshop (#pinchofyumworkshop) under the expert guidance of Ms. Ostrom:
As they say, a picture is worth a thousand words and this one says it all.
The takeaway message is: No matter what your age, grab every opportunity you can to evolve into the most enthusiastic person you can be. And one way to do that, at least what worked for me, is to learn everything you can about the things that interest you. Because time is fleeting, yet it is yours for the taking.
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